Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Tragic...
My "street kid" is known for being truant. After our little "episode" in November, he left home every morning with his mother thinking he was coming to school, yet he wasn't. He was off for three days in a row like this until I got the counselor at school involved. The counselor followed up with a home visit and got the kid's social worker involved as well. We all had a meeting at school and it became a daily routine to watch for this boy to arrive at school at 8:30am. If he wasn't there by 9:15am (most kids stroll in around 8:50am anyway), I was to call the counselor and assistant principal for them to call home and make sure everything was OK. In December he actually came to school and worked. Yes, he actually completed some homework and turned in some classwork. For example, every month we start a new writing unit. Based off what I am currently teaching them, we follow the "writing process" (creating, drafting, revising, editing, and publishing). When "street kid" was in third grade last year, he never published any work. He completed the hardest writing unit yet and his published piece was great. Sure it wasn't a prize winning paper, but he worked on it and tried hard. Most of all, he turned it in with a smile on his face. It was a proud moment for both of us. The assistant principal on my floor has been commenting about seeing him smile and knowing I have made a difference on his life. Although we started off rough and we still have our "moments" (he still hasn't cooled down the language in class), I know I have made a difference and took pride in working with him everyday. This year I feel he has formed a special bond with me and it touched me. Sad to say this has all changed now.
Monday morning I went to work, same as usual. When he didn't come in, I did my thing and called around to notify the appropriate people. My assistant principal called me and said they had heard from "street kid's" mother and they needed to talk to me about what was going on. Immediately I asked if "street kid" was OK. He's OK, but something has happened I was told. The assistant principal and the counselor came to my room and I stepped outside while my kids read in the classroom. "Street kid's" brother was murdered over the weekend. Huh? What? You mean to tell me a child in my room's family member was KILLED? Yes, shot 5 times in the chest. Holy shit. I was upset, obviously, because I knew "street kid" was probably now lost to me for good. He would be out for this week and next so the family could take the body to Mexico for a familial burial. The family will either stay in Mexico and that's the end of "street kid" in Brooklyn, or they will return in February and that's the end of the special bond we've created. I cried. I talked about it with J. But, I couldn't discuss it with the rest of the class because the counselors want to do that Friday. Nobody but us knew. Well, that was just Monday.
Tuesday afternoon the school posted a memo to the teachers in the mail area about the death. They put "street kid's" name as well as our room number on the paper. Then people began talking. Out of nowhere I had teachers talking to me about it. Again, I was upset. The class still didn't know anything and I tried to act as natural as possible. The memo also asked for money as the family is struggling with the funeral costs and travel stuff. (They are poor anyway- my "street kid" came into school the second day of school not having eaten anything since lunch the first day of school.)
Wednesday (today), the school raised almost $1,000 for the family (damn) and I attended the wake with the assistant principal and the counselor after school. I have never experienced anything so disturbing. Open casket, cheesy Mexican music, kids running around playing and screaming, and people crying hysterically. We paid our respects to the mother ("street kid" was not there), and sat for about 20 minutes. It was a tiny room and all I could focus on was the dead body int he casket about 10 feet in front of my line of vision. My eyes were watering and started playing tricks on me (I swear I could sense him breathing). My face was flushed from the heat in the buildings and the cold wind outside. I realized- I have never seen a dead person before and it was really fucking creepy. I walked to my car a few blocks away and started dry heaving. When I finally got into my car I opened the door and threw up outside into the gutter. Totally tragic and so sad. This poor kid- a dead older brother at the age of 10. And i think the worst of it is, he was murdered. This is the harsh reality of where I teach and now I start to wonder how many of my students have been through something like this as well....
My "street kid" is known for being truant. After our little "episode" in November, he left home every morning with his mother thinking he was coming to school, yet he wasn't. He was off for three days in a row like this until I got the counselor at school involved. The counselor followed up with a home visit and got the kid's social worker involved as well. We all had a meeting at school and it became a daily routine to watch for this boy to arrive at school at 8:30am. If he wasn't there by 9:15am (most kids stroll in around 8:50am anyway), I was to call the counselor and assistant principal for them to call home and make sure everything was OK. In December he actually came to school and worked. Yes, he actually completed some homework and turned in some classwork. For example, every month we start a new writing unit. Based off what I am currently teaching them, we follow the "writing process" (creating, drafting, revising, editing, and publishing). When "street kid" was in third grade last year, he never published any work. He completed the hardest writing unit yet and his published piece was great. Sure it wasn't a prize winning paper, but he worked on it and tried hard. Most of all, he turned it in with a smile on his face. It was a proud moment for both of us. The assistant principal on my floor has been commenting about seeing him smile and knowing I have made a difference on his life. Although we started off rough and we still have our "moments" (he still hasn't cooled down the language in class), I know I have made a difference and took pride in working with him everyday. This year I feel he has formed a special bond with me and it touched me. Sad to say this has all changed now.
Monday morning I went to work, same as usual. When he didn't come in, I did my thing and called around to notify the appropriate people. My assistant principal called me and said they had heard from "street kid's" mother and they needed to talk to me about what was going on. Immediately I asked if "street kid" was OK. He's OK, but something has happened I was told. The assistant principal and the counselor came to my room and I stepped outside while my kids read in the classroom. "Street kid's" brother was murdered over the weekend. Huh? What? You mean to tell me a child in my room's family member was KILLED? Yes, shot 5 times in the chest. Holy shit. I was upset, obviously, because I knew "street kid" was probably now lost to me for good. He would be out for this week and next so the family could take the body to Mexico for a familial burial. The family will either stay in Mexico and that's the end of "street kid" in Brooklyn, or they will return in February and that's the end of the special bond we've created. I cried. I talked about it with J. But, I couldn't discuss it with the rest of the class because the counselors want to do that Friday. Nobody but us knew. Well, that was just Monday.
Tuesday afternoon the school posted a memo to the teachers in the mail area about the death. They put "street kid's" name as well as our room number on the paper. Then people began talking. Out of nowhere I had teachers talking to me about it. Again, I was upset. The class still didn't know anything and I tried to act as natural as possible. The memo also asked for money as the family is struggling with the funeral costs and travel stuff. (They are poor anyway- my "street kid" came into school the second day of school not having eaten anything since lunch the first day of school.)
Wednesday (today), the school raised almost $1,000 for the family (damn) and I attended the wake with the assistant principal and the counselor after school. I have never experienced anything so disturbing. Open casket, cheesy Mexican music, kids running around playing and screaming, and people crying hysterically. We paid our respects to the mother ("street kid" was not there), and sat for about 20 minutes. It was a tiny room and all I could focus on was the dead body int he casket about 10 feet in front of my line of vision. My eyes were watering and started playing tricks on me (I swear I could sense him breathing). My face was flushed from the heat in the buildings and the cold wind outside. I realized- I have never seen a dead person before and it was really fucking creepy. I walked to my car a few blocks away and started dry heaving. When I finally got into my car I opened the door and threw up outside into the gutter. Totally tragic and so sad. This poor kid- a dead older brother at the age of 10. And i think the worst of it is, he was murdered. This is the harsh reality of where I teach and now I start to wonder how many of my students have been through something like this as well....
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Suburban Flip sent me this...I do it all, except for the praying part- what could that do to help me in the classroom?
TEACHER APPLICANT
After being interviewed by the school administration, the eager teaching prospect said, "Let me see if I've got this right:
You want me to go into that room with all those kids, and fill their every waking moment with a love for learning.
And I'm supposed to instill a sense of pride in their ethnicity, modify their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse and even censor their t-shirt messages and dress habits.
You want me to wage a war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, check their backpacks for weapons of mass destruction, and raise their self esteem.
You want me to teach them patriotism, good citizenship, sportsmanship, fair play, how to register to vote, how to balance a checkbook, and how to apply for a job.
I am to check their heads for lice, maintain a safe environment, recognize signs of anti-social behavior, offer advice, write letters of recommendation for student employment and scholarships, encourage respect for the cultural diversity of others, and oh, make sure that I give the girls in my class fifty percent of my attention.
My contract requires me to work on my own time after school, evenings and weekends grading papers and preparing lessons.
Also, I must spend my summer vacation, at my own expense, working toward advance certification and a Masters degree.
And on my own time you want me to attend committee and faculty meetings, PTA meetings, and participate in staff development training.
I am to be a paragon of virtue, larger than life, such that my very presence will awe my students into being obedient and respectful of authority.
You want me to incorporate technology into the learning experience, monitor web sites, and relate personally with each student.
That includes deciding who might be potentially dangerous and/or liable to commit a crime in school.
I am to make sure all students pass the mandatory state exams, even those who don't come to school regularly, don't complete any of their assignments, or have no parental support at home.
Plus, I am to make sure that all of the students with additional handicaps or challenges also get an equal and appropriate education regardless of the extent of their mental or physical handicap and often without any extra materials or personnel that would allow these students to compete on a more equal footing with their peers.
Additionally, I am to communicate regularly with all of the parents by letter, telephone, newsletter and report card.
Finally, I am to make all subjects interesting to all of the students at all levels of ability so their self esteem always remains high and they never feel bored by any tasks.
All of this I am to do with just a piece of chalk, a computer, a few books, a bulletin board, a big smile, a positive attitude at all times, and on a beginning starting salary in many states and school systems that qualifies my family for food stamps!
You want me to do all of this and yet, you expect me NOT TO PRAY???????????????????"
TEACHER APPLICANT
After being interviewed by the school administration, the eager teaching prospect said, "Let me see if I've got this right:
You want me to go into that room with all those kids, and fill their every waking moment with a love for learning.
And I'm supposed to instill a sense of pride in their ethnicity, modify their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse and even censor their t-shirt messages and dress habits.
You want me to wage a war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, check their backpacks for weapons of mass destruction, and raise their self esteem.
You want me to teach them patriotism, good citizenship, sportsmanship, fair play, how to register to vote, how to balance a checkbook, and how to apply for a job.
I am to check their heads for lice, maintain a safe environment, recognize signs of anti-social behavior, offer advice, write letters of recommendation for student employment and scholarships, encourage respect for the cultural diversity of others, and oh, make sure that I give the girls in my class fifty percent of my attention.
My contract requires me to work on my own time after school, evenings and weekends grading papers and preparing lessons.
Also, I must spend my summer vacation, at my own expense, working toward advance certification and a Masters degree.
And on my own time you want me to attend committee and faculty meetings, PTA meetings, and participate in staff development training.
I am to be a paragon of virtue, larger than life, such that my very presence will awe my students into being obedient and respectful of authority.
You want me to incorporate technology into the learning experience, monitor web sites, and relate personally with each student.
That includes deciding who might be potentially dangerous and/or liable to commit a crime in school.
I am to make sure all students pass the mandatory state exams, even those who don't come to school regularly, don't complete any of their assignments, or have no parental support at home.
Plus, I am to make sure that all of the students with additional handicaps or challenges also get an equal and appropriate education regardless of the extent of their mental or physical handicap and often without any extra materials or personnel that would allow these students to compete on a more equal footing with their peers.
Additionally, I am to communicate regularly with all of the parents by letter, telephone, newsletter and report card.
Finally, I am to make all subjects interesting to all of the students at all levels of ability so their self esteem always remains high and they never feel bored by any tasks.
All of this I am to do with just a piece of chalk, a computer, a few books, a bulletin board, a big smile, a positive attitude at all times, and on a beginning starting salary in many states and school systems that qualifies my family for food stamps!
You want me to do all of this and yet, you expect me NOT TO PRAY???????????????????"
Thursday, January 06, 2005
Happy New Year!
I've been in hiding, a social outcast, a lonely hermit bound to the apartment.
School is no better than it was September 13th and I have to grin and eat shit until June 28. I have asked my administrators for letters of recommendation and am waiting for them to begin my application process to other schools. I do have stories, which I'll share at another time when I am a little more alert.
My birthday was December 17...yes, I am now in my last year of being in the 20's. No real downer or anything. My students tried to make it a special day and I hung out with my good friend J while T worked. Nice, relaxing day. T did get me a full spa treatment and I can't wait to get in for my hour facial and how massage.
Holidays spent in CA with the family was gross. Upset stomach, achy joints, and lots of crying due to nasty attitudes and hurtful words. The funny thing is all the nastiness had to do with our wedding. Yes, you read that correctly, no one wants to come to our wedding because it's too much of a "hassle". My dad, the once "i'll pay in support of tradition" is now haggling and acting like the finances to our wedding is a business transaction. T and I have made no wedding plans because we were waiting to hear how much dad could give, you know, as a gift to his daughter who is getting married. Nope, it was a business lunch where certain aspects were conditional and T and dad got into a verbal altercation right there at the restaurant table. Then there's grandma who flat out said she won't be there. What a great, loving time that trip was!
I am tired, but wanted to write. I've been meaning to get on the computer, but with all the freezing up and pop ups, it was impossible for me to remain calm. However,with MSG and EM watching the sweet boys for the week they installed a new browser which is working fabulously! more later.....
I've been in hiding, a social outcast, a lonely hermit bound to the apartment.
School is no better than it was September 13th and I have to grin and eat shit until June 28. I have asked my administrators for letters of recommendation and am waiting for them to begin my application process to other schools. I do have stories, which I'll share at another time when I am a little more alert.
My birthday was December 17...yes, I am now in my last year of being in the 20's. No real downer or anything. My students tried to make it a special day and I hung out with my good friend J while T worked. Nice, relaxing day. T did get me a full spa treatment and I can't wait to get in for my hour facial and how massage.
Holidays spent in CA with the family was gross. Upset stomach, achy joints, and lots of crying due to nasty attitudes and hurtful words. The funny thing is all the nastiness had to do with our wedding. Yes, you read that correctly, no one wants to come to our wedding because it's too much of a "hassle". My dad, the once "i'll pay in support of tradition" is now haggling and acting like the finances to our wedding is a business transaction. T and I have made no wedding plans because we were waiting to hear how much dad could give, you know, as a gift to his daughter who is getting married. Nope, it was a business lunch where certain aspects were conditional and T and dad got into a verbal altercation right there at the restaurant table. Then there's grandma who flat out said she won't be there. What a great, loving time that trip was!
I am tired, but wanted to write. I've been meaning to get on the computer, but with all the freezing up and pop ups, it was impossible for me to remain calm. However,with MSG and EM watching the sweet boys for the week they installed a new browser which is working fabulously! more later.....
